Putting on one of my favourite tunes “Devils haircut” by Beck, we got into the mood.
I have been really excited about going bald today. Don’t think I would have done this without chemo, but now that it’s happening it feels like it’s the right thing to do. Making it a positive event all together I chose to let my two kids cut off the hair; they were definitely thrilled about the whole thing. We had a ball doing it and I’m very, very pleased with the result.
Sad thing is it can still feel somewhat uneasy. Not because of me, but because of my surroundings. I already know from several friends that are perceived as female that being bald is not looked upon gently. Comments varying from “a shame, you’d look so pretty with hair” to invading question from total strangers like “are you having cancer” or even blatantly touching of the skull without permission. Actually the the biggest worry is concerning making others uncomfortable. My scar, my uniboob and the baldness are all unsettling for others.
Well, all in all I don’t give a damn, I have no choice but to not give a damn actually. I guess I’m a kind of in your face person and the fact that I have cancer will not make me apologise or hide myself. Not fitting in can be strenuous and tiresome, but the more we are queering this world, the nicer this place will be for all of us. The more we all fight the norms and do as we want instead of just trying to pass, the more diverse and including our culture will be. If you have the strength and energy: please do this, otherwise we all lose.