Finishing line just became a moving target

Had a near perfect day Tuesday, even found a new raincoat in the thrift store that was a perfect match
Summer is coming to an end and my favorite season is here. I love the colors of autumn, the leaves turn orange and red, and the wind and rain sweeps everything clean and fresh. But yesterday the colors weren’t there at all and it was just a splash too grey. Unfortunately I had to postpone my second last treatment; the neuropathy was getting worse and I don’t want to jeopardize my health. My right foot is kind of ‘humming’ constantly now and it sort of tickles in my face on/off; imagine the feeling of tiny hair on your face that you can’t brush off. If I apply any pressure to my hands or feets the neuropathy gets significantly noticeable. Everything felt kind of good the day before chemotherapy, but the last 24 hours up the neuropathy sensation grew, especially in my right foot to the point that it became constant. I called the oncologist and we agreed to postpone for at least one week. I’m telling you, I’m getting sick and tired of feeling my body all the time. On top of this, from out of the blue, my left foot turned all rainbow on me, I have no recollection whatsoever of doing anything that could result in this. Of course it’s equally likely that there was a heavy blow on my foot, but my chemobrain has forgotten that it actually did happen(!) Not sure which is the better option there… 

Colorful foot on a grey day
Bottom line I wish I could just ignore everything that’s going on in my body and then check in with myself when this is over! Well, no can do. I’m the only one responsible for not messing my body up; I’m trying to act responsibly then. Good thing is it *is* very nice to take a break from chemotherapy, even though I’m postponing the end of this with another week (for crying out loud, I’m so close.) Now my body gets a chance to heal until next week; if I’m back to normal I can finish the treatment. If I’m not, I probably can’t proceed with the Taxol and we have to find another solution. Not sure what exactly that is at the moment, but I’m sure my amazing team at the hospital will know what to do. Now I’m simply enjoying this break and the extra energy it provides; which also gives me confidence in the fact that life will return to me as soon as chemotherapy is done! Already day 8 I feel more sharp and able to write and focus on tasks. Moreover the last week has been good to me, I have managed to get a lot of stuff done, lots of workouts (yes, I’m sticking to the plan so far, who would’ve figured) and even been attending work for bimonthly planning. I’m feeling better at average at the moment, I think that seeing the end is giving me a push in the right direction.

Spent a whole day at the theme park “Sommerland Sjรฆlland” with the kids this weekend

So now it’s yet another week packed with things including more workout, redecorating the kids’ room, hanging out with tons of family all weekend and my first ride on a motorcycle Monday. And if everything goes according to plan something cool will happen Sunday. So stay tuned! 

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